Dad refuses to see 19-year-old son after claiming he ‘finds it hard to love him’, knowing son doesn't love his stepmom, son walks out of dad in response: ‘I don't love the family they have created’

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Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Aug 15, 2025 6:00 AM EDT

Is parental love really unconditional? 

Well, if you take the love between the father and his 19-year-old son in the story below, the answer would be no. This father's love for his son is conditional on how the son feels towards his wife, to whom Dad got married when the son was 10 years old. Despite being quite young when his dad's wife came into his life, the son never felt like she replaced his late mom, and didn't feel a parental connection to her. She respected that, and they formed a friendship that they were both happy about.

The person who was not happy about this friendship was Dad, who wanted a stronger connection between his son and his wife. But he chose to express that by telling his 19-year-old son that it's hard to love him this way. 

Is the only way this dad could love his son if the son showed more affection to his stepmom?

This doesn't feel like a healthy family, which led the son to walk out on his dad and tell his wife what happened between them. Keep scrolling to read the rest of the tale.

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  • 01
    A man reflects in the car mirror
    via maks_d

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    AITA for walking out on my dad when he told me he finds it hard to love me because he knows I don't love his wife?

    I (19M) was supposed to be spending the day with my dad a few weeks ago only for him to turn around and tell me he wasn't sure he wanted to. That he finds it
    via Kushluennan
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    hard to love me because he holds the knowledge that I don't love his wife and by not loving his wife I don't love the family they have created the way he wants
    via Kushluennan
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    me to. He said this makes it very hard to keep our connection alive. This was totally out of nowhere. We'd had the plans for over two weeks and I drove
    via Kushluennan
  • 05
    three hours just to be told that. I didn't really have anything to say to any of that so I walked out and went back home.
    via Kushluennan
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    He has texted me a few times since then asking why I left, saying he wants to talk. His wife and I texted a bit and she told me she didn't understand
    via Kushluennan
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    what happened. I told her she might want to talk to him and I filled her in on what happened. That took her by surprise and she
    via Kushluennan
  • 08
    said she'd talk to him and get his head on straight. She later texted and apologized that he did it supposedly on her behalf
    via Kushluennan
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    and she wanted me to know there are no hard feelings. Dad has told me he wants to talk it out and he wants
    via Kushluennan
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    me to understand that walking out like I did wasn't the right way to handle it either. But that we can't leave it like that. I asked him what the point of
    via Kushluennan
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    him what the point of talking is when he doesn't know if he wants to spend time with me and finds it so hard to keep the connection going.
    via Kushluennan
  • 12
    BG info for anyone who wants it but if you don't need it then AITA? My dad married Lil when I was 10. I didn't want her around at the start and got
    via Kushluennan
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    really upset that dad was married 2 years after my mom d d. Lil told me she understood me not wanting a new mom or stepmom and that we
    via Kushluennan
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    Woman Walking Up the Stairs
    via rattanakun

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 15
    could be friends if I'd prefer that. For a while I didn't but then I came around a bit. We developed a not super close friendship but it's there. We're not the most
    via Kushluennan
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    natural fit around each other but we're both pretty open and honest which meant we didn't hurt each other's feelings or anything and we like each other.
    via Kushluennan
  • 17
    My dad never got involved really. The only time he said anything was when Lil was pregnant with their first and I was about to have a half sibling. Dad
    via Kushluennan
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    said he noticed I wasn't very excited and I was like yeah I'm not really. He told me he wanted it to be an exciting time for me as well and I told him it just wasn't.
    via Kushluennan
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    But I did later get involved a bit to make him happy and that was basically it. They celebrated both pregnancies and kids, I was never excited but
    via Kushluennan
  • 20
    developed a fondness for my half siblings and everything was good. My relationship with dad was super close (or so I thought) until this.
    via Kushluennan
  • 21
    SpecialProfile2697 I would have walked out too, NTA.
    via SpecialProfile2697
  • 22
    Inevitable-Cut8156 NTA your dad sounds like a jk. avoid him for a while and go enjoy your freedom. got your whole life ahead of you, kid
    via Inevitable-Cut8156
  • 23
    FormSuccessful1122 NTA His love for his own son is contingent on how much his son loves his stepmom? That is bat ``t crazy.
    via FormSuccessful1122
  • 24
    Fearless-Fennel4929 NTA your dad is very blatantly picking his wife over you. He's also being a manipulative about it. I'd of walked away too. Honestly cut him off. He clearly stated he didn't want to spend time with his SON so what's the point.
    via Fearless-Fennel4929

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family drama aita kids mother siblings stepmom reddit story parenting dad love family Reddit women parents children entitled people Father
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